Twin Flames: When To Let Go

Dr. Lisa Xochitl Vallejos
3 min readAug 5, 2019
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When it comes to Twin Flames, one of the biggest questions is when to let go and move on. Some people believe that in these soul connections, there is never a right time to let go. In one sense, they are right in that if we truly have a soul connection, we will always be connected in some way. We will always share some type of bond.


There does come a time when one must evaluate the connection and determine whether it is wise to remain actively engaged in it or whether it’s time to release it to ONLY be a soul connection.

A wise man once said, you gotta know when to hold ’em and know when to fold ’em so without further ado…

Here’s how to know it’s time to let go.

1. You haven’t had contact in a year or more OR if the person hasn’t contacted you in a year or more. If they only reply to your attempts to contact them with things like “LOL” or a GIF but never really engage, it’s time to let go. If you’ve reached out and they don’t reply, it’s time to let go. If the only time you have contact is because you make the effort, it’s time to let go.

If they have blocked you, repeatedly told you they don’t want contact with you or they simply are not engaging, then it’s time to let go. This is the point where you learn to surrender and trust.

2. They are married, in a relationship or commitment and are making no moves to get out of it. Now, I am not going to condone or condemn falling for a committed person so let’s check the guilt/shame at the door. However, we are never, ever, ever to interfere with the contracts someone made before they met us.

If the person you love is in a relationship and is making no attempt to get out of it, let them go. Don’t push them to leave, don’t try to force their hand, but allow them to use their free will. If they choose to NOT use their free will to get out of a situation they claim to be unhappy in, then let them go.

3. There is abuse in the relationship. This is a hard stop for me and I want it to be that for you. If they are in any way abusive, let them go. In a true Twin Flame connection, while there may be challenges and issues that arise, there will never be outright abuse. In fact, in a true Twin Flame connection, as people do the work to heal and transcend, the connection will become easier and more fluid over time. If the connection has been in place for a long time but isn’t getting better with work, it is time to let them go.

Hanging onto a connection when these things are present only keeps you stuck and watching your life pass you by. When you learn to release what is no longer serving, you can find the love and liberation you deserve.

*If you would like support on your TF journey, here’s how to work with me.